knowing what you want and letting it go is a practice. embodying a vibe instead of chasing one is erotic surrender. you know an experience will bleed through the course of your life when you have a hard time distilling it.
i floated off the charter bus as if i had finally arrived. first in line to check-in, greeted with hugs and muahs from soon-to-be lovers and friends—as if i had fallen directly into the lap of desire.
prior to the festival, i had some cupping done—wing expansion. i felt my heart’s willingness to connect. right after setting up my tent, i had a cutie on my arm wanting to make out and roll around in the grass. “you can touch my chest like that, but you can’t touch my chest like this,” surprised by my own real-time boundary setting, i shuddered with joy in that play space.
it felt good to be both effervescently reckless and responsible—every me getting their needs met. throughout the weekend, i returned to being where i was over and over and over again. each day, i had found myself in circumstances of contact of all kinds.
every smooch consensual and every touch bliss—on the final day, the crux of my kinkiness had traveled toward reality as a destination. around the fire, i asked for exactly what i wanted. “hey guys, i want you to eat breakfast with me, and i want us to start the day together.”
we did just that—laughing and sweating out our bodies under the far out Pennsylvania sun. we devised a plan to spend the day naked by the lake. ketamine and kisses abound, i’m belly toward the sky, euphoria briefly my name, when the urgent ping of needing to urinate begins to sting.
the *ughs* of annoyance in my body language visceral—i moan and pout, “i have to pee.” all at once we go silent—somehow not in a rush to move—a curious voice of confident fantasy shrugged, “what if you just peed right here?” the invitation swooning—i smiled real big, imagined how it’d feel, negotiated peeing in a manner beyond my programming then slowly, let the warm fluid run free—a release i’m still chewing on a week later.
i never imagined kinky activity would show up in such an innocent way? more about trust, comfort, and safety than getting off or feeling hot—but those things too? my deposition agape mixed rigorous and tender adult enjoyment was the perfect concoction for heaven-level magic. may we all get what we want by being in the practice of letting it flow; i mean, go. <3 ;-)
kamraaaa <3 what a gift to see this title in my inbox & what a gift to witness your bliss. fireworks in my heart 4 u
Heheh lovvvve :)