Care Ecology is a free weekly newsletter where I hold myself to account, explore being a noun in verb flux, and structurally sass my way through the muck of living. Lived experience mixed philosophy partial poetry, Care Ecology inspires existential itch.
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i am learning to dissent being only a good time.
what to do when relating hurts as much as being alone? a group meditation technique has been floating around my ears the past couple months and i leap at any potential to grow my relational body. learning to authentically relate is the single most challenging tether of my life—the very thing i am designed to do causes relentless autonomic arousal.
each whole is also a part—i am taught in “A Brief History of Everything”. i am a whole thing made up of whole things that are part of me—the thing that is a whole/part containing whole/parts. holons1 make up reality and are governed by an axis of agency, communion, self-transcendence and self-dissolution—what a wild grid reality is—the distance between existence and nonexistence—the axiom of these governors.
a loved one told me over the phone yesterday i am safe in conflict with them—it was the first time i’ve heard these words—my whole/part relaxed. felt like a sign i am aligned—when you hear something that makes you go “yes—this is the life i want.” knowing how your whole contributes to my part is where love and safety mingle. loving is safe, but we have to know ourselves in order to be safe people to love.
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whole/parts